To Trust Someone
by Sehrezad
Summary: Hotch told Morgan at the end of “Mayhem” that he didn’t really trust anyone. That’s my take on what could have happened after that... with a little Morgan-Prentiss ship thrown into the mix... Written for the Gone Country Challenge


**To ****Trust Someone**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything, neither the show, nor the song._

_Summary: Hotch told Morgan at the end of "Mayhem" that he didn't really trust anyone. That's my take on what could have happened after that… with a little Morgan-Prentiss ship thrown into the mix because it's me and I can't help myself. Written for the Gone Country Challenge._

***

"Just laid it all out on the line, too late to take it back this time. The silence here is deafening, so afraid of what she's thinking. Did I just scare her off or make her mine?" - **Adam Gregory **(_Then She Cried_)

***

Morgan took a deep breath then knocked on her front door. For a while there was no noise of any kind to be heard from inside Emily's apartment. He sighed putting one arm on the door and leaning against it in a vain attempt to ease his nervousness and collect his whirling thoughts. God, he'd never felt that nervous before. But he was determined and he would not leave. He wouldn't be a coward anymore.

He lived the greater part of his life in cowardice. He was too afraid of letting anybody in… of sharing his feelings because it would have made him vulnerable in the eyes of others… it would have make others judge him… it would have result in rejection. Hotch had been right in New York before they started back to DC. He was a man who didn't trust anybody.

He gave it some serious thoughts on the road back to Washington. He was thinking about the people in his life… his family… his friends. By the time he was sitting in the car just one block away from his apartment, he had reached a conclusion. And now he was standing in front of Emily's door ready to do something he hadn't done in a very long time… to bare his soul to somebody… to trust somebody completely.

He knocked again. Louder.

This time he could hear some shuffling in the apartment but it took Emily some time to finally open the door. A little smile appeared on Morgan's face as he took in Emily's so uncharacteristically dishevelled look. He always loved to see her wearing a pair of old faded jeans and a sweatshirt which was at least twice her size.

"Hey." He greeted her silently. She just blinked up at him then turned and walked into her living-room without a word leaving the front door open. Morgan stepped into her apartment and shut the door. He felt slightly uncomfortable in her cosy apartment. He could never really get used to being there. Somehow he always felt out of place. Not if it would have been a great problem in their so called relationship. In the last couple of months, since they first slept together, they usually met up at his place. It was very rarely her place and maybe that was why he loved her present attire so much. It made him feel welcomed… it made him feel at home.

By the time he entered the living-room, Emily had been curled up in her couch with a glass of red wine in her hand. Morgan raised a questioning eyebrow at the sight of the half empty wine bottle on the coffee table.

"You are drinking alone?" He asked trying to hit a light tone. Emily just shrugged.

"I was but apparently I'm quite a boring company." She took a sip of her wine and Morgan gave her another questioning look while taking a seat next to her on the couch. "I felt asleep." She explained and he smiled. "By the way, congratulation for your promotion!" She told him sincerely accompanied with a faint smile. "You'll do good. You deserved that."

"Well, about that…" He began awkwardly fidgeting in his seat. "I came to talk with you… There is somethi…"

"Don't, Morgan. Please." She cut him off looking at him pleadingly and her little smile completely vanished. "Just don't."

"What?" He furrowed his brows utterly confused. "You don't even know what I wanted to say."

"Oh, believe me, I do know it." She answered bitterly and stood up putting her glass on the coffee table. "I've heard it before."

"But…" Morgan looked at her baffled as he stood up, too. He was desperately trying to explain what he meant but once again he didn't have the chance to finish his sentence.

"Look, Morgan. We really don't need to complicate it. I'm truly happy for you and you don't need to explain anything for me. I hope you'll be happy in New York." And with that she started to the front door to let a still stunned Morgan out. She didn't want to seem rude but she was sure if she didn't end that conversation before it would have even started, she'd have to listen to the whole load of crap she really didn't want to hear at the moment.

Morgan didn't move until he heard the door open and only then did he began to walk towards Emily. However, he didn't make any attempt to leave the apartment. He stopped in front of the woman.

"Why?" He asked her silently and dejectedly. Why didn't she give him the chance to talk? Emily sighed and gave him a small sad smile.

"Contrary to popular belief…" She started. "It didn't make it any better or easier if you tell me that it was fun and really good and all that stuff which is supposed to make me feel better. Trust me on that, I've already heard all of it." And she definitely didn't want to hear it from him. He was her best friend and she didn't want to remember him as another failed relationship. If he wanted to end what they were having then she wanted to part as friends. "Well…" She said awkwardly after a little while as Morgan hadn't said anything, nor did he move. He was just looking at her still confused and sad. "Good luck." She told him sadly and leant closer to him and kissed him on the cheek.

She couldn't pull away, though, as Morgan had put his hand on her waist preventing her from moving away. "I didn't accept it." He whispered into her ear hoping that she would understand what the implications of that statement were.

"What?" That was all Emily could say in her surprise, her voice uttered in a whisper, too. And Morgan suddenly understood what Emily's thoughts must have been concerning his promotion. He stepped back letting go off Emily's waist.

"You thought that I'm here to dump you." It wasn't a question. It was a sad statement still uttered in a whisper. At the moment he couldn't decide which hurt the most, Emily thinking that she didn't worth giving up a chance like this promotion or her thinking that he wouldn't do it for her in a heartbeat. Though, on the other hand, he knew that he himself hadn't done much to assure her about his feelings. But than again it wasn't the nature of their relationship… He so hoped to change that.

"Yes." Emily answered in a way which clearly told him it hadn't even occurred to her that he might have refused the new position.

"Emily… I don't want to leave you. I know that we haven't talked much about these things but I care about you… a lot… and I want to be where you are." A little smile appeared on Emily's face.

"You know that I care about you, too." She told him gently stroking his face. "You are my best friend, Derek." He slowly reached up and took her hand into his.

"No, Emily. You don't understand me." He said seriously and took a deep breath. "I'm in love with you." There it was. He said it aloud. He had trusted her enough to tell her his real feelings and now he didn't know what to do. He didn't know what she would do. Would she laugh at him and tell him that he was speaking nonsense? Would she be angry for him making their friendship uncomfortable and awkward? Would she smile and say 'I love you, too'?

She did neither of them…

…she began to cry softly. Her tears made wet tracks down her face and he couldn't help reaching up and wiping them away.

"Em… I'm so sorry. I didn't want to make you cry." She just shook her head desperately trying to get rid of the tears but she didn't say a word. Then she stepped to the still open door and closed it gently staying there facing the door. Only when she had managed to compose herself, did she turn back to him. Truth to be told, she was taken completely off guard by his confession. In her mind she had already played every possible scenario of this particular conversation and surely neither of them contained him telling her that he loved her and wanted to stay with her. It was simply unfathomable for her.

"Derek. You do know what you are talking about, don't you?" She asked him seriously. After all that was his chance… a well-deserved promotion… He surely didn't think it over enough. Morgan thought otherwise, though. He stepped closer to her effectively trapping her between him and the door. That was his chance… his chance to change his life forever.

"Emily, these last few months were the best days of my life." He so wanted her to see what he meant. He so wanted her to say something other than questioning his feelings constantly. "And I'd be damned if I let it all go just because of a job." Emily opened her mouth to say something but Morgan silenced her with a finger. "Please… I don't ask you to confess your undying love for me… All I ask is to trust me… I know it's difficult, believe me, I know it. But give me a chance… give us a chance."

And there were the tears again…

He couldn't dwell on that subject for long, though, as a moment later he could feel Emily crushing against him burying her face into his shoulder. He put his arms around her and couldn't help letting out a sigh of relief as he held her close to him.

And while holding Emily in his arms and hearing her whispering him those words he so longed to hear, he understood how it all worked. You take the chance and trust soemone and in return they trust you…

It wasn't easy but he had already taken the first and most important step. He took the risk to trust Emily and he knew that with time he would be able to trust others as well.

**THE END**

_I would have never thought that this day would come but country songs began to appear on my play-list… oh well…_

_Thanks for reading and sorry for the mistakes!_


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